Stay Calm & Be Cool

Lately there has been a lot of religious nonsense going on that I thought it was time for me to pause and reflect on my life… and after much intense deliberation that took all of 15 minutes, I came up with a set of guidelines/commandments/rules for an ideal way of life, a religion even. Lets call this, the ‘Stay Calm & Be Cool’ religion.

  1. Thou shall not lie, steal, cheat, con, fool, scam, hoodwink or bamboozle anyone because…that ain’t cool, bro!
  2. Thou shall do good things unto others, not because some invisible guy in the sky said so but because of common sense, manners, courtesy, empathy, goodwill etc.
  3. Thou shall eat whatever thou wants, whenever thou wants and wherever thou wants. But seriously bro, read the label and/or google that stuff before you eat.
  4. Common sense is not so common. It is neither inherited nor available online or offline. It needs to be earned, just like respect.
  5. Thou shall always be happy. Thou shall not knowingly or willingly make anyone unhappy …unless that person is a total douche, then please, by all means go ahead.
  6. Thou shall not kill people. Thou is free to kill their egos however.
  7. Thou shall not discriminate against anyone in any form because everybody is fucked up in their own miserable ways, including you.
  8. Thou shall not get offended simply because somebody has a different opinion than yours, however stupid that might be.
  9. Thou shall strive to get oneself and everybody else educated. Explore the world and learn because education is more than the degrees and certificates you hold.
  10. Thou shall stop using thou so much. Just STAAPHH!!!
  11. The internet is a digital quicksand. Be afraid, be very afraid.
  12. It is not about who is stronger sex and who is the weaker sex. It is all about what we can do Together, other than sex, that is.
  13. Sex is great! Completely natural and recommended daily. But don’t cheat on your partner, that’s not cool!
  14. Everybody lies. Everybody leaves. Shit happens. Deal with it.
  15. There is always a better explanation than ‘Gods will’. Or in other words, ‘Science, Bitch!!’
  16. Having loving parents is a privilege. Being a loving parent is an art.
  17. The purpose of life is not solely limited to getting married and having kids.
  18. Music is awesome. Your collection of songs tell a lot about who you are.
  19. Have a favourite sports team or athlete and live vicariously through their success and failures. You owe your miserable lives at least that much.
  20. Animals are meant to roam this planet, not locked in chains or shot dead for fun. And yes, some of them taste delicious.
  21. Stop shitting on the planet so much, people! Come on!!
  22. War and violence is never the answer unless the question is ‘What is the stupidest thing mankind still indulges in?’
  23. All disputes among men shall be settled by referring to the Bro Code. If it not in the Bro Code, it is not worth our time and the dispute will be instantaneously discarded.
  24. Sorry girls, I am unaware of what code you beautiful creatures follow…let me know so that I can edit this point later.
  25. FRIENDS are an important part of life. I mean, that TV show is just awesome! And yeah, those people things are important too.
  26. Sarcasm is a language that can neither be taught nor learnt, it can only be understood and expressed.
  27. No means No. Learn to say no. And more importantly, learn to hear & understand no as well.
  28. Can this religion BE any more awesome?!
  29. And last but not least, Stay Calm and Be Cool. Just chill bro!
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One thought on “Stay Calm & Be Cool

  1. Pingback: The Greatest Resume Ever Prepared! | Pepsicated

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